52.14 Motherhood is..... Learning

Life is full of learning.  Hopefully we as adults strive to learn something new everyday.  I know I do, and that helps to not only fill up my knowledge tank but makes me feel alive.  I'm constantly teasing Matthew that he is full of useless knowledge.... but I will say, every time he opens his mouth I learn something new.

I think Motherhood is very similar.  I learn something new EVERY day!!  This comes in all sorts of ways... Sometimes its as easy as Jackson opening his mouth or doing something, perhaps this new bit of knowledge comes from another mom sharing wisdom, or some times its as easy as a bit of self reflecting.

With the birth of Benjamin coming tomorrow, I have been looking back on my last 19 months of being a momma and reflecting on my journey of learning!  I can honestly say that I have learned not only a ton about being a mom, but about myself, the kind of mom I strive to be and my son.  I can desire and teach certain things for Jackson all day long, but he is his own person and sometimes you just have to let go and see what he figures out.

I have tried harder these last few weeks and if I'm to be totally honest more these last few days, to really let Jackson be the intelligent, independent young man he's growing into.  Its been a battle.... with only a short period of time left, I've wanted to hold on more.  Smother him with more love, kisses and hugs.  Make him feel my love... LOL!!  Even typing that I know how emotional that sounds.  But its the truth and I am okay with allowing my silly ideas to hit the screen.

I know as parents our "job", or "goal" or even "mission" in life is to teach our children, but I think there is another side to this... We are to sit and learn as well.  Our children are innocent little beings with no life experience outside of us, so this makes them more adventurous, more trusting and more at ease.  I think I can take my son's advice and see life through his eyes a bit more.

I have LOVED being just Jackson's mommy these last 19 months and I know that he has taught me as much as I have taught him.  We have been a fun team of 3... But I also know that we are going to be an even better team of 4!!

I am proud of the mommy I have become and the lessons I have learned.  I have many, many people to thank for those lessons.  But I also know that I am about to start a new chapter in life and learn more... being a mommy of 2 boys should be interesting.

Today, I thank Jackson for teaching me about being a mommy and for rolling with the punches!  You are amazing son and I love you more than words.

Exploring his surroundings

52.13- Motherhood is..... Sharing

Teaching your children to share can be tricky! Jackson, like most children his age hasn't yet grasped the idea of sharing. He's in the "mine" phase..... From his shoes, to my phone, everything is "his" (lol).

Like most mommy's I'm doing my best to teach him through words and actions, the meaning of sharing.
But I think the best example comes from kids close to his age.

The other day we began to notice that Jackson seemed frustrated with his toy selection. I reached out to my sister in law in hopes that perhaps she might have some toys that my nephews have out grown. The feedback was wonderful! My (now) six year old nephew, Lucas was on a mission!!
Within a few days we had a box of some of Lucas' favorite toys, that he had outgrown. He sat down with Jackson and showed him how they worked and any tricks he may know.

Watching them I saw the true example of sharing! Now, in part due to my hard work but probably more of Lucas' example, Jackson asks me to sit with him and we play together!

It really is amazing the things our children learn from each other!

52.12- Motherhood is.... Praying for Grace

The other day I saw a mommy post on Facebook that she needed patience, (don't we all) and one of the comments from a dear friend of mine, made the suggestion that she pray for grace instead!

At the time I thought what an amazing idea but didn't think much past that moment!

Today, in the middle of many emotional meltdowns (and yes, at times it was both Jackson and I crying) I remember the suggestion of praying for grace!

Grace- elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action.

So today, I prayed for Grace as a mommy! I prayed that my actions showed love, even though I had to be firm. I prayed that the manner in which I handled his tantrums was delivered in a way of strength and not frustration. And finally I prayed that through this entire day of trying moment after trying moment, I showed God's love and grace to my amazing boy!!

I'd like to say that our day got easier as it went on, but that would be a fib! But we did have some wonderful cuddles (while crying... I called it the hug hold), some giggles and silly moments, and at the end of the day those are the moments I need to hold close!!

By Grace I will be the best momma I can be and pray that my boys only remember the silly, loving moments that accompany our rough days!

So today I too will remember the silly moments and instead of posting a picture of Jackson melting down (yes, i actually took one. I know, awful mommy, but it caught me off guard), I'm going to share my favorite silly moment of our day.....

Doing daddy's silly face!

52.11- Motherhood is.... Remembering to Take Time for Yourself

Being a mother is a full time job! And being a stay at home mom, is even more full time then one can imagine!

Some days seem never ending.  At times going to the potty is the only few moments you get alone, except for the pounding on the door, lol!  You notice that its noon and you are just getting your shower, or perhaps you have a few extra minutes and you can jump in and run around real quickly before then, but not without once again the pounding on the door, lol.

The shower, the potty and of course of morning cup of coffee, use to be my quiet moments.  Moments that I more than likely took advantage of.  I never realized how special those bits of quiet were or how much they helped my sanity.

But now as a mommy of almost two young boys and I understand the need for making time for myself.  I know that in a few short months even Jackson's nap times are going to be busy with taking care of Benjamin, so I must take the time now to enjoy the quiet moments I have left.

My morning cup of coffee, my evening book and of course any other few moments of quiet I can get will be taken with a new found appreciation.  Because without those moments, I can't be the best mom or wife I can be.

52.10- Motherhood is.... Building a Foundation

As a parent there is so much we try to teach our children. We want them to be confident, outgoing, kind, loving, understanding, we want them to respect boundaries and stand on their own.
Lately, I've been really focused on how blessed I am! Maybe it's the time of year and celebrating my anniversary or perhaps it has to do with the distance Matthew and I are experiencing with him working in San Jose. Either way you slice it, I've never felt so blessed!
My blog last week I talked about my amazing husband and sharing this journey with me. My mother-in-law made a beautiful comment that has really stuck with me!
She said... "Beautifully said. Someone once shared with me that the secret to a happy family was to ensure that first and foremost your focus should be your marriage, with God at the center. Your children would feel loved and secure inside that incredible bond, and also learn to have healthy relationships as they grew. Your lovely words personify this message. Jack and Ben are lucky boys."
These words have spoken so strongly to be and I can't help but feel that through the commitment of marriage, Matthew and I really are building the foundation for our boys to have all the hopes and dreams we wish and pray for them!
Living by example and showing our boys the gift of love, faith, commitment and respect.... Those are the stones of foundation we hope to instill in them.

52.9- Motherhood is..... Being Thankful For Your Partner

So, I've been struggling with this current blog, which is why it's Tuesday and Im just getting it out. I originally had one I was working on, but when I went to finish it this morning it was gone. Ugggh!!!
I'm taking that as a sign along with today being my 2 year Wedding Anniversary to change my topic and write about my amazing partner, who shares this journey of Parenthood with me!
I have to say that God really knew what He was doing when He put Matthew in my path!! He knew exactly the kind of man I need in order to balance my life! There are SO many things we share and are alike in, but there are almost as many way that we are different. He brings a sense of calm into my world, builds me up when I'm in doubt and always has my back, even if he doesn't see things the same way! We have an amazing marriage built on mutual love, respect, understanding and communication!
But above all of these amazing characteristics I get to add that he is an unbelievable daddy!! To watch him with our son is the greatest gift! I always knew he was going to be an amazing father but to watch him.... Beyond my wildest dreams!
He gives our son things that I'm not strong in and adds balance to his life!
He is the perfect partner and daddy for our family and we all benefit from his love and dedication to our us!
Love you baby!! Happy Anniversary and thank you for being exactly who you are and bringing this family the perfect combination!!
Xoxo

52.8- Motherhood is..... AWESOME

It's true, I admit it, being a mommy really is awesome!! I always knew I wanted this "job" when "I grew up" but I never really thought I would really be blessed to stay home with my boy(s).
Jackson has been in an extra lovey mood these past few weeks! He runs up to me and snuggles his face into my legs. He looks at me with adoring eyes and says my name. He's even started holding my face for kisses!!.... Awww my heart just melts and I know I'm doing exactly what I was meant to do!!
There are challenges that every mommy faces. Whether you stay at home or leave everyday to go to a job. Being a mommy is exhausting at times, but no heart can resist that first smile of the day or the grin they give when they do something they shouldn't!!
Parenthood is AWESOME!! And I'm thrilled to be with my boy(s) everyday, discovering new adventures, challenges and tickle spots!! There's no place I'd rather be!!